Ding Dong Bell

With springtime in full swing it's time for gardening aficionados to turn their fingers to greener pursuits - but that's no excuse to neglect your nobs! If any of you nobwatchers are planning on visiting the garden centres this weekend, make sure to Keep One Eye Out for this elegant piece of garden decor spotted by @pubby. We'll certainly be obtaining one for the Nobservatory grounds! 

The graceful curve of the nadgers will look at home in any verdant herbaceous border and the striking arc of the dong topped with it's feature ding dong bell end makes it the perfect conversation piece for nobby garden parties! It certainly gets our recommendation!

Percy Grower

Gardening Expert

Somerset Schlong

This impressive schlong was spotted by a friend of NobWatch in sunny Somerset. Stretching a mammoth 1.5m along the picturesque country lane, this nob proves that nobart is far from a purely urban passtime. The nobartist's skill in large scale nobart is evident, once one gets past the extraordinary size of the whang, the eye is drawn to the delicate veiny detail and ethereal jizzcloud at the tip.

Manpost

This wonderful flaccid dong juxtaposes its own droopiness with the solid steel post which is its canvas. The pert bollocks speak of energy, yet the chunky shaft droops groundwards ineffectively. Note the gaggle of youf lurking in the background. NWUK suspects these miniature miscreants of being the nobartists, yet their reticence is clear, their distance kept from their artwork. Experts at the Nobservatory believe that this constraint may be connected with the flaccid image, had it been a fine tumescent wang, it is thought they may have been more forthcoming....

Putney Town Penis

A swift nobs up to all the members of the Putney Town Rowing Club. We don't know whether one of your members drew this as a welcoming sigil informing other nobartists that here, they would be at home. Or maybe someone drew it because he thought you were all nobs. Either way, the Nobservatory salutes you!

Shadow Wiener

Look closer, Nobwatchers... Closer still... Can you tell what it is yet? This shadowy dong was discovered by an unwary nobwatcher staining London's underbelly with its sinister umbrage. A nobby version of a magic eye poster - a magic japseye!

Traffic Warden Todger

We all know traffic wardens can be sadists, but the creator of this dusty masterpiece enjoyed rubbing the salt in their victim's wounds way too much. Luckily for NobWatch UK s/he had talent! Spotted on a car sporting a parking ticket, this nob exhibits evidence of it's maker's savage instinct. It would appear that the perpetrator slapped on the ticket then gleefully etched out this dong - no mean feat considering the thick layering of the grime - proclaiming the driver a nob! Thereby adding insult to injury in the most literal sense.
NobWatch UK disapproves of Traffic Wardens as a rule however there's no doubt that this one has great talent in the field of nobart. NobWatch UK would recommend the artist gave up the day job and took up professional nob drawing - a far less offensive career.

Nazca Line Beachnobs

Pembrokeshire Beach Nob

Connemara Beach Nob

Alien Intervention?
These mysterious sand phalli appeared at the same time but hundreds of miles apart, one in Ireland the other in Wales.
Though one design could herald a potential new Natural NobArtist in the vein of Andy Goldsworthy, - the chance of two appearing simultanously, can only mean superior intelligence is involved. Drawn to exactly the same scale, experts claim that co-ordination on this level would require sophisticated technology beyond that of human scope and an aerial perspective to achieve these precise lines of design.
UFO landing lines similar to those of Nazca Lines in Peru?, we can only speculate wildly.

Wild Speculation of UFO Landing Site on back of Envelope

Pocket Rocket

To Celebrate the Grand Achievement of Yuri Gagarin's First Manned Space Flight around the Girth of the World, on 12th April 1961...  the Nobservatory Salutes You, you have some serious Balls!

Wienerstrasse

NobwatchUK was delighted to discover this homage to Nobart on the wonderfully named Wienerstrasse!
What would appear to be a shop sign in the sociallyacceptableinoffensiveconformistart style reveals hidden nobby depth. On closer inspection the diminutive tackle is brightly coloured in pastels gleefully projecting a stream of fluid joy forming a little heart shape. Exquisite!

Easter Bunnynob

Happy Easter Nobwatchers! Just for you on this fine spring day, a cuddly little bunny!

(with a great big flaccid dong drawn in it)

Nobzilla

Reaching menacingly across the blank wall, Nobzilla is an impressive example of outsized Nobart. The vein details are unfortunately obscured by the shadows of a nearby tree, however the clarity of the hefty bollocks, stretching the scrote ever downwards and the excellently crafted tip with foreskin detail make up for it.

The Wanker Ranker

This nob was snapped by a roving friend of Nobwatch in the Borderlands. Unusually it is sporting a score! Nobservatory experts are currently working around the clock to identify the scaling and criteria used by the judge. Clearly this tinkle is top of the class, but for what reason? It's sheer length is notable, even for a eunuch category dong, but it's semi-flaccid angle and wavering lines have yet to reveal their 10-plus merit to Nobservers.
Once again it appears that there is no accounting for taste.